Sometimes Slumps Happen

I miss Sunday mornings, with you.  Waking up, cooking breakfast, drinking coffee and reading the Times.  You always stole the Best Buy ad and sometimes the comics, making a mess of my organized paper in the process.  Then we would set out for our day.  Sometimes a trip into the city, a day at the Arboretum or into the Cascades where you would try your hardest to scare the hell out of me with your off roading skills.  I miss making food with you.  I miss dinners at your mom's house.  I miss that we had the same taste in restaurants and that you enjoyed trying new places as much as I did.  I miss the trip to the coast when we camped on the beach.  I miss the trip we took to your grandmother's house, driving up the Oregon coast on our way home - one of my fondest memories.  I miss the comfort of knowing that when catastrophe struck that you would be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on.  I miss calling you to tell you I'm on my way home.  I miss night snowboarding with you.  I miss the boy who made it a point to plan one of the best final tours of Seattle a girl could ask for.  You knew all of my favorite places and made a point to hit nearly every one of them.  I miss Fondue on New Years and well, Fondue ever.  I miss our habits and our routines.

But there are things that I don't know if could tolerate going forward.  What you tolerate becomes your norm and I tolerated things I shouldn't have.  Doing more than my share of housework.  If I pay for half of everything, I only do half of the housework.  Period.  I'm a neat freak and I can tolerate a mess for only so long.  And if I do clean your shit up, do something to show me you are thankful for my efforts. I deserve respect.  I can't tolerate anyone who is not supportive of trying things that I like also.  I demand compromise, honesty, an open dialog about the state of what we feel is going on and how we feel about it.  I'm incredibly diplomatic, open minded and flexible, you should utilize that about me.  You won't find that in very many people.  

I just read this comment on Jezebel. In response to this article.

"This actually helps if you're in a slump in an established relationship. I know when I've gone through down periods, it's helped if I:

- Remembered to be kind
- Made sure kisses happened
- Had sex

It hurt if I let the slump take over everything, turning down or not initiating sex, getting snarky, and letting up on the small, physical things. Sometimes slumps happen. No one did anything, but if you let it color your relationship, it can be impossible to get out of."

Great advice to follow, going forward.  

Laundry is done, dishes are done, dinner has been consumed, garbage put in the dumpster.  I'd say I've had an evening well spent.  I will spend the rest of it deciding which of the five books I'm currently reading will get my attention for the remainder of the night.  

My song for today.